Good night prayers

I have posted prior about our good night routine.


The girls lay on the bottom bunk as we read a story that each have picked out from the bookshelf. Then a bible story is read. We say prayers and the blessing before kissing them goodnight and leaving the room.

Who says the prayers?


Lily and Elliot answers Adam or my verbal prompt, 
"What do you want to thank God for, Lily? Who needs God's help, Lily? " Then she just talks to a Friend...

Elliot's turn... she says almost the exact same stuff Lily did, unless that night she is talking in her made up 3 year old language. Maybe it's tongues?

For the first 3 weeks, we asked Yana, "What do you want to say thank you to God for?"
"I no understand" would be the reply.  
Every. Night.

Even after we translated it. She would say "I no understand," with a smile.
Almost as though she was trying to get attention for not praying. We would ignore the attention seeking behavior and the escape from the task of praying, and finally after about 3 weeks into the hosting experience, we just stop asking her to pray aloud.

Not on purpose, I don't think. Yana is still part of the routine. She will still pick out a book for me to read-a-loud and we still give her the blessing.

Three days ago, Adam and I were putting all the girls to sleep, and she said in her loud deep voice, "me" while we were praying.

And then it happened, "Thank you for Keem, thank you for Adom, thank you for Leely, thank you for Alex, thank you Elliot, thank you for Babushka Sherry, thank you for Babushka Noreen, thank you for Pap, thank you for Papa......"
She must have listed every person she has met in America. She even thanked God for Lily and Elliot's swim teacher, the pool, the cats and dogs, her Sponge Bob kiki, the horse she rode one day and cheese on toast.

"Yana, anyone need God's help?"

"Alex......and Yana."

We showered her with a ton of attention. 
She was thankful, she was thankful for everything. EVERYTHING!!!


Our bedtime prayers are a bit longer now,  but I cannot walk out of that room without the biggest smile on my face. Feeling grateful for all the people we have in our lives. Something I take for granted without the innocence's of a child to remind me.

He called a little child and had him stand among them.  And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.  Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 

 Matthew 18:2-4

Family

Last night, my three year old daughter cried for me from her room about 30 minutes after laying her down for the night.

 "Mama!" she screamed through the tears, "I have to tell you something."

"Yes, baby, I'm coming," I walked through the dark hallway into her room and lay down beside her on her bunk bed, her 5 year old sister laying next to her fast asleep.

"I need you, sleep here," as she grabs my neck, "I love you too much" she whispers.
"I love you too," I tickle her back until she dowses off back to sleep and I prayed. I thank the Lord for blessing me with this child, for giving me the time to spend with her and lay with her. Being there in her time of need...maybe it was a bad dream, or a sad thought, maybe she just needed her mommy to show her that she is wanted and loved.

While praying, Alex and Yana popped into my head. 

These beautiful children, who are broken and sad and un-trusting and fearful, the images of them, like a picture in my mind. I thought about there life up until this moment, I became angry. 
Why them? They have so much love to give. They only want to please. They deserve a mommy. One that will tickle their back when they have a sad thought. 
Every child does.
I began to cry, silently.  Slow tears roll down my face, I kissed the three girls (my host daughter, and 2 biological girls whom were safe and securely asleep in their beds). I then, quietly, walked out of the room.

FAMILY

"We are family." Something that I say often, basically my go to phrase....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why we no go?"Yana impatiently asks.
"We are family, we wait for family." I try to reason with her, as Adam and his dad buy Alex his first cappuccino after a Boo Hoo Crew Concert at Ryan Brothers Coffee.

   As the weeks quickly pass by, Adam and I have began to slowly take the kiddos out of their comfort zone and introduce them to more and more people, with them being able to tolerate the situation appropriately.

 Last week, Adam's parents came from Ohio and stayed with us. (We were able to get full use of my mini van, 8 seats woohoo!) Alex and Yana both bonded with Pap and Babushka but it took time. Sherry, Adam's mom came whispering to me with a big smile on her face, "that's the first thing she said to me. " Ecstatic that finally, on the second day of their visit, Yana actually acknowledged her. By the end, Babushka Sherry and Yana were creating delicious master pieces in the kitchen. Oh and Alex, well Pap Larry taught him some great American phrases to try out on the ladies at the beach, "How you doin?" 

  We set our schedule the night before, so Alex and Yana have a sense of control and routine. It comforts them, they know what to expect. We have found this to be helpful and try very hard not to veer from the schedule. 

However, on Sunday on the way to church around 10:00, I got a phone call from my mom inviting us to a last minute family get together in Los Angeles at 2:00. "I don't know mom, we already decided what we are going to do today. But I will give them a choice and I'll call you back." 

"Alex? Babuska Noreen on phone, we can go to jump pool, OR we can drive 2 hours and see my family."

"We are family, we go see family." 

"You are right, we go see family."

Our trooper

My girls are ALL girl. From barbies to dress up...they are...pink, satin, bejeweled little girls.

Yana, when she first came here tried to be so tough, she walked tough, didn't smile, and would turn away from any embrace.

Yana has not just come out of her shell, she exploded out of that shell! 
She is blending into this girly girly family, full of Cinderella, little people Princesses, and high clip clop heels.
 She has moved into the girls' room, clothes and everything, and now sleeps on the top bunk, rather than having her own room with a TV. She wakes up first and crawls in bed with Adam and I (desperate for touch and warmth, she lays her head on my chest and closes her eyes). She feeds and brushes the dogs without us even asking.  She 
leaves us at church to help in Lily or Elliot's 
Sunday school room during service. 
God has given her so much confidence in such a short time. She has truly grown because she now knows she is loved, by God and by us. 
Cuddling, screaming, singing, laughing so loud, this is Yana now. The tough, scared little girl from 4 weeks ago, would not even recognize this brave, confident girl. It is the best, and I feel truly blessed to have witnessed and continue to witness the transformation!

Alex has grown too, but he has not embraced the girl life style as much :(. 
Although we have tried to convert him, and will get the occasional tiara on his head for a split second. Or see him do a cute ballet turn when he thinks only the girls are watching. Or I will get a smile out of him when I offer a boa for him to wear for the tea party happening at our very own 
kitchen table.

Poor Alex, surrounded by girls. He is desperate for man time. Trips to Home Depot to help rebuild the fence with Adam. Trips to the circle park to play soccer. Beach with his friends from the orphanage that are also being hosted (and one who has 
recently been adopted). 
We even got TV last week, so he can occupy his time doing that. He watched soccer with my uncle and Adam, and WWE with, well...no one because it is absolutely the worst show ever! 
(just my opinion). 

But does he ever complain? Never.
 He helps the girls put on their barbie's dresses. He changes the channel when Lily gets scared during Phinnies and Ferb. He fills up another water balloon for Elliot when she popped it in her lap. He switches otter-pop flavors with Yana, because she wanted the blue one. He plays tea party and 
pushes the girls on the swing. He is such a trooper.

On Tuesday night last week, I went to Micheal's Craft Store to buy t-shirts for my summer school students to make for the Field day we were 
having. I bought a couple extra for the girls to make creations, I ask Alex if he wanted one. He looked at me like, you have got to be joking..."Oh ya! I forgot, you are too cool" I said with a smile. We did purchase him a drawing notebook and some pencils because he loves to draw and he is quite good.

This is the first picture he drew with the drawing notebook, a picture for the girls and one he would hate me to share publicly.  But it's just too good!

Saturday night, the girls started to design their shirts... Using fabric crayons and computer paper, they drew whatever they wanted. Lily drew a princess and a squiggle design for the back. Yana designed a Spongebob t-shirt. And they have been wearing them almost everyday since.

When Alex actually saw what they were doing, he was intrigued..."I do?" 
"Sure, I can go get you a T-shirt." There was that look again, 
"No, not me, Lily and Elliot..." 
"OOOO, you want to make shirt for the girls, sure." 
Directed at Lily, Alex asked "I make Frozen shirt, Lily? Who? "
"Anna is my favorite."

Alex then disappeared for the night into his room. The next morning, he brought me the drawing..."you drew this? Oh my goodness, Alex this is amazing." Then there it was, a huge smile, so proud of his creation, and so excited I was proud of his effort. "Kim, you...." as he gestures iron with his hand. "Yes of course, let's do right after I get home from school and surprise Lily." 



We ironed on the drawing and he took it and ran into his room, Yana and I followed. He opened the closet where I keep the wrapping supplies and pulled out a dark pink bag with black velvet designs (very girly). And then he just through it in there...such a guy. I stopped him and showed him how to use the white tissue paper, as he responded,
 "America's Crazy." I laughed, he then took the camera off the desk and went down stairs with the present. He wanted me to take video.

The look on Lily's face was awesome, but the look on Alex's face was even better. One of pure joy. Him giving to my 5 year old daughter, his host sister made him happier than I have ever seen him. So cool.

Thank you God for both of these children. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to meet them and love them. I pray that you guide our path. Help us to be a light for them and to love in all circumstances.

"He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds...Great is our Lord, and mighty in power..."
Psalm 34:19


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dental visit

   

   I am a novice to this hosting experience, and the donation aspect has been and continues to be a struggle. However, I thank all those that have provided the many blessings to these orphan children. There experience here in San Diego, has been super sized because of everyone.  Just as our bank account is running low (embarrassing, but true), all of sudden a text message comes and states, hey my mom has a check for Yana and Alex. God is so good. The kids don't have to feel the pressure that Adam and I were beginning to worrying about.

The Dentist:  

  Something that is highly recommended of host parents by Children's Cultural Connection, the hosting non-profit organization that we are working through, is for the kiddos to receive dental exams/cleanings and vision tests.  We have been blessed by our own family dentist  whom we have been going to for the past 5 years and my own children love. I only made one phone call and they squeezed there exams and cleaning in the next week. 

  Alex was beyond nervous.  As I would front load him of the week ahead, he would say "NO Dentist, NO." I would laugh, pat him on the back and say in a calm, sweet voice, "it's not a choice, love." This happened almost daily, maybe he hoped my response would be different.

   I received a Facebook message from a friend I worked with a few years back, one who I don't talk to very often, but on Thursday she felt the need to message me. Alex's fear was becoming overwhelming at that point, he had began to withdraw into his room. "What can I pray for specifically?" she wrote. My reply, "the dentist visit tomorrow." 

  My last day of summer school was  Friday, and I was not able to attend the visit. Unfortunately, there will be three more appointments EACH. But, at least I will able to attend those and be a support for them. 

  I was getting updates while at work via text message from Adam.  

Alex is really nervous, waiting in the waiting room. Alex is getting better, they're taking him to get x-rays. Alex is so much better. We found out Alex is missing a molar. Alex is fine.  

  How is he just missing a molar?  "It bad tooth, no medicine," as he gestured with his fist, a yanking movement.  Wait, seriously, they pulled your tooth without anything? Gone. Completely. Empty space. No medicine? No wonder you hate the dentist! He explained that when he goes to the dentist at home, they look at his mouth and say...good, good, good, except one time bad. 

I was able to figure out which was the "bad" tooth the one "bad" time. 

  Dr. Marler and Dr. Cambell's staff were so amazing with both kids, as I knew they would be. They eased there worries, and helped them to trust. Both Yana and Alex have several cavities, and one possible molar root canal, we will have to wait and see. (and if that is the case we will have to see a specialist.) 

  

  They scheduled all the dental work for the next two weeks, (I am pretty sure some of the appointments are during the staff's lunch time). We will be spending lots of time there. 

The most amazing part...They are donating it all! 

Everything, from the goodness of their hearts. Thousands of dollars worth of work, several hours of time, multiple appointments, ALL FREE. 

What an amazing gift from God. 

Thank you, Thank you Dr. Marler & Dr. Campbell, you have blessed us and these children more than you will ever know. 

No longer are these two children alone, forgotten, abandoned. 
They are loved. 

So loved, by us, by God, by everyone who has met them. 

Shopping.

   My family and I live relatively simple. Yes, we splurge on going out to dinner after long days at work and we will buy things for our girls, but in reality, I shop at Ross and TJ Max,  and most of my furniture is from craigslist or handed down from family members (pieces that have been spruced up with sandpaper and a coat of paint).  
   I am not a label wearer, when you are 5'10, you don't get that privilege, if the jeans are long enough, I buy them. Period. Don't really care about the label or style. Bellbottom, fine. Skinny jeans, great. Bootcut, perfect. 
   Please do not misinterpret my first paragraphs, I like nice things, and have nice things, but boy do I love a bargain! Coupons, clearance racks, furniture off the side of the road...Woohoo! So much fun.
  
   BUT, above shopping, I value time with God, time with family, time with friends, and hard work! These are things I have tried to bestow in my own children, to be grateful for gifts received and to be gracious. In this family you are given what you need and earn what you want... Our girls know that we need to be "responsible" with our money and make good choices.  Lily, my 5 year old, will keep me on my toes, "Mommy, do we need that?" when shopping the dollar bins at Target. I guess we don't need it :(

Hosting

  We are blessed to be in a position to give. We want to be generous with our giving. I would love nothing more than to spoil these children, all four of them. But is that helping them? Is that being responsible? Is that Godly? 

"Of what use is money in the hand of a fool, since he has no desire to get wisdom?" 

Proverbs 17:16

Alex asked for a hat last week, "Of course, you can have a hat." Thinking to myself... OOO ... shopping, maybe Marshall's will have a good deal. My thoughts were interrupted...
"Wan's hat" 
Excuse me, huh? "I don't understand"
"Wan's hat" 
Adam chime's in from the other room... "VANS hat!" 
Seriously...we are getting particular now!?!?

"OK Alex, you can earn a Vans hat. You will have to work for it though."
"He can help me paint the fence." Adam says, now joining the discussion in the kitchen.

Alex, at first was not too keen on the idea of working for his hat. He actually told us no and that was that. But two days later, when he remained hat-less, he asked again "Wan's hat?"
"You ready to paint a fence?" I hoaxed.

"Da."

Love "oops" paint from home depot, 7 dollars!

They finished in 2 hours, and we went directly to the Vans store...

"Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth" Proverbs 10:4

It would have been so much easier to just give him the hat he wanted. But there is something to be said about working for things. Earning things.  I never appreciated things until I worked for them.

(Sorry mom and dad for being such an ungrateful teen, I love you.) 

And because Alex worked hard...

He loves that hat and takes better care of it than his soccer shoes (he was just given).

 It feels good to earn something. 

I wasn't surprised with the obsession of a certain brand, he is 16 years old. That stuff matters at 16. I was surprised he did not want to work for it. Alex is very ambitious, he likes to work hard. He likes to push himself in soccer. He vacuums like a mad man, getting every last piece of dog fur off the couch. He works hard at English. He continues bike riding trying to perfect the art. 

A neighbor called out to me last week, "He's getting better." 

It is cool when complete strangers notice God's work in people's lives. 

 

  He did have a bit of a spill, but he allowed me to clean it up. And he was out riding the next day.

 Yana has come such a long way with God's healing grace. The girl who would shutter when Adam came near her, will now play with him in the pool and grab his hand while they cross the street. She will run down stairs and greet me with a huge hug when I return from work. She will share and take turns with Lily and Elliot, and is no longer hoarding items (food, toys) in her bed. She knows that she and her things are safe here. 

We had an amazing Saturday with family. We went horse back riding and walked miniature ponies around my Aunt and Uncle's Ranch. Yana learned to ride and to lead a horse. She learned how to take off the bridle and saddle and rinse the horse, then put him back in his stall. 

She had the best smile all day. 

Love this smile, pure joy.

After all the fun outside, my cousins let all the girls put on make up and try on different hats. 

Nothing like an impromptu fashion show/photo shoot to make it...

THE. BEST. DAY. EVER.

 "Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."

Matthew 25:45

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